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You take 6 vacations a year and you want to throw all that away over 45 cents?NOW THAT’S A JEWISH MOTHER!✧ ✧ ✧From dorsetmike‎She says “Why don’t you say you love me anymore?”He replies “I said it once, I’ll let you know if the situation changes.”✧ ✧ ✧This one is from fmwarmac‎So I asked my wife, “Why do you keep buying plants when you just kill them?”She said, “To remind you what I’m capable of.”✧ ✧ ✧Last week I bought a brand new boomerang, even though I can’t seem to get rid of the old one.People who put some money away each week just aren’t shopping hard enough.I bought some fridge magnets. So far, I have 10 fridges.A jellyfish walks into a hardware store and buys ten drills.Supermarket: a place where you can spend a half-hour looking for instant coffee.How can you spot people who can’t count to twenty? They’re in front of you in the supermarket express lane.I bought some Haagen-Dazs ice cream, and as the cashier rang it up, I asked: “How do you pronounce that.” She said slowly:. I laid down where she told me and before I could say anything she raised her High Heel to my cock and gently started to massage it. She told me that she had seen me masturbating and thought that I would rather have the real thing, which was her rubbing my cock with her Suede High Heel Shoe. She took her other foot and placed it next to the one on my cock and rubbed with a faster pace. I could see up her Slip from where I was lying and the sensation was unbearable. She told me to cum and within seconds I could feel the warm liquid covering my underwear.She had me stand-up in front of her and by the way she was breathing I could tell that she was enjoying this. She pulled down my blue jeans leaving only my underwear with a large wet spot where her High Heels had made me cum. She pulled me to her and began kissing the wet spot leaving her Red Lip outline on my shorts. She licked the spot and within minutes my cock was hard as a rock. She stopped for a minute to reapply her.
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